Longings

I saw a Marine addressing a circle of friends who obviously weren’t in the military. By his gesticulations, I assume a story was being told. His animated gestures spoke of excitement and enthusiasm and experiences. By the looks on the faces of those around him, they were impressed but also a bit confused. I’ve seen that face before. I tell someone about an experience and it doesn’t connect at all. They try to be polite, but then silence ensues… and a change of topic. There will always be those who don’t understand.

There are things about my life that I wish were different, like that every-female-struggle with reality versus the airbrushed look on the cover of most magazines or the wish for the creativity of Joanna Gaines. There are things I wrestle with about my personhood and identity. There will always be struggles with measuring up when I compare myself with others.

But there are also more deeply rooted things like broken relationships and health struggles. There are regrets and desires and dreams. There will always be longings for more, for better, for wholeness.

Sometimes the messages that the world pushes are like waves crashing over me. I scramble to get out from under one only to be tumbled by the next, unrelenting in their consistency. I wish that I could stop my ears just for a moment and ponder what is true and good. There will always be longings for peace.

I know that those longings can only be fulfilled in one place. Our hearts find rest in only one way. Psalm 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God. Cease striving. Stop scrambling for all the things that this world tells you will fill your heart with contentment. This whole world will never be enough. Physical strength fails. Relationships disappoint. Beauty fades. Pleasures dwindle. But “we shall be satisfied with the goodness of your house, the holiness of your temple!” Psalm 65:4b And so I remember that there will always be hope.

 

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